No Matter What


No matter what, my child, I will be.

“Will you be?,” I questioned the Lord,
“Will there be nothing that could separate us and break us apart?
I am still haunted by the echoes in my head.
I am still tearing down myself from all these thoughts.
I am being clouded by fearful imaginations,
That the day might come when I will fail you, Lord.
And that I might not stand in front of you,
That you would reject me.”

No matter what you fear, I will remain faithful.
No matter what you think, nothing can separate us.
No matter what happens, I will save you.

“Will you?” I questioned the Lord,
“Will you really? Some people say it’s difficult.
They say it’s hard to get to heaven.
That, If I am not persecuted, I will burn in the pits of hell.
At times, I think of you as a cloud of wrath,
Just waiting above until the time comes,
When you’ll strike with your iron fists of thunder
and send everyone helpless, desperate for life.
Your judgment scares me. I might not be saved.”

No matter what, believe me, I will rescue you.
No matter what they tell, I will never forsake you.
No matter what happens, I will love you forever.

“Won’t you?” I questioned the Lord,
“What if I fail? What if I sin against you?
What if I don’t make it through, and I won’t do
all that you command me to?
What if I don’t want to do anything at all?
I am not worthy at all.
I am not as good as them.
I could not preach you to my friends.
I am so tired, Lord. I am so unable.
Forgive me.”

No matter what you are, I will not hate you.
No matter how you fail, I will never be mad at you.
No matter what happens, I will keep you in my arms.

“Are you?” I questioned the Lord.
“Sometimes I couldn’t feel you.
I feel as if you’re leaving me. I don’t feel your embrace.
I cry because what I’m going through is so hard,
yet I don’t feel you. Would you do that?
Maybe it’s me. Yes, it is me…
Not reaching you enough. Not talking to you enough.
Not faithful or righteous enough in my actions.
Is that it, Lord? Please, tell me.”

No matter what you do, I will remain true.
No matter what you feel, I will be with you.
No matter what happens, I will pull you through.

“What about it?” I questioned the Lord,
“I am lazy. I make excuses to not know you.
I choose to sin instead of seeking you.
Sometimes my thoughts are filled with darkness,
Full of lust, of curses, of hate.
At times I hate you. And, at times I don’t believe you,
Will you still save me, then?
Will you still love me, then?
Will you still keep me in your arms, then?
Will you still pull me through, then?
I am tired of thinking like this, Lord.
I am tired of being like this,
I am tired of not looking, searching hard enough.
I doubt myself at times!
But, you are my only hope!”

… … 

“Lord, will you still love me?”

Then the Lord said to me,

My child, I will still love you, and will continue to love you.
I have forgiven all your sins on the cross.
I have demonstrated my love for you.
In me, you are no longer condemned.
I work even your mistakes into good.
In me, you are pardoned.
In me, you are healed.
I have redeemed you from the pit,
I have crowned you with compassion.
I have shown you what love is.
And I offer you rest from works.
I offer you peace.

Neither death, nor life,
Nor angels, nor principalities, Nor powers,
Nor things present, nor things to come,
Nor height, nor depth,
Nor any other creature,
shall separate my love from you.
No matter what happens, nothing can stop me from loving you.

Now, tell me, my child, do you still not believe that I truly love you so?
My love for you, I showed at the cross.
I ransomed you from the power of the grave.
Will you not believe that what I’ve done is finished?
Will you not understand that all you need to do is believe in me?
You need not labor, nor be heavily burdened,
For I have done everything for you.
Will you not find rest in me?

I cried, and nodded, as He boldly instilled upon me these words.

He loves me… no matter what.
Indeed, He does.
I may have a lot of questions,
a lot of doubts,
a lot of mistakes and failures,
but then…
All He asks me to do is rest..
To His finished work.
He is for me…no matter what.
And so, I will not let go of Him.
And so, I will not worry.
And so, I will not try to save myself.

God, You are my only Hope.

Scripture Reference:
I John 1:9, Romans 5:8, Romans 8:1, Romans 8:28, Psalm 103:1-5,
I John 3:16, Hebrews 4:10, Philippians 3:8, Isaiah 26:3, Romans 8:38-39,
Hosea 13:14, John 6:28-29, Matthew 11:28-30

This dialogue between the narrator and God has been in my mind for some time now. To be honest, I am so confused right now. These are all my questions to him, and I know a lot of you ask Him the same.

Yet He is the Truth – and the truth is, He loves us no matter what. We have to truly believe it.

48 thoughts on “No Matter What

  1. Tacticianjenro,
    This is awesome! You nodded yes; you’re acceptance is wonderful! Have you reached the end of yourself and stored up His treasure of love in your heart so you are filled with His grace? (I have treasured your promise in my heart so that I may not sin against you. Psalm 119:11 GOD’S WORD® Translation (©1995)) As I’ve been telling you my friend and everyone, you do this by repeating His Amazing Promise of love for you out loud over and over for at least 3 or 4 weeks until His love moves from your head to deep within your heart! That’s when you’ll truly believe it and stop doubting it. At that point, you’ll have His Power to do everything you admitted above that you can’t do on your own – to surrender to Him everything in your life that’s not of Him, every false love you’ve been holding onto. Salvation is a 2-step process; being filled with His grace, and then using that grace to surrender every idol to Him until He eventually sends down His Holy Fire on you. Once He does, Lookout World! because you will rock this world! (but not before)
    Blessings in Christ Jesus,

  2. i really like it! it’s kinda awesome and wonderful.. now, I know HOW MUCH GOD LOVES US.. im
    ashamed enough for not believing Him, for doubting His love, behing these, yet, He sent me a friend
    who would introduce HIS great love for mankind.. he’s the sole reason why I ended up reading this..
    Anyway, thanks ^_^ i reflect. Godbless

  3. I have been encouraged reading this. I relate to your struggles coz I have similar struggles and thats why this hit home for me. And so thank you and I receive the unconditional love of God in my heart too, just like you and we shall continue to be strengthened in this grace. Amen.

  4. I love love love love love love love love love love love love love love LOVE THIS!!! :D I almost cried reading this! This is amazing! You so talented! Keep it up!! Because I know God is very proud of you :D .

  5. May I share with you some words I wrote many years ago when I was struggling?

    At times I wondered how a perfect God could ever understand
    The pain I feel when I know I’ve failed time and time again.
    I wondered how my Lord could know the loneliness I feel.
    He never felt this painful shame; no wounds of sin to heal.

    But that was what the cross was for
    There in love He opened heaven’s door
    His own father had to turn His face
    From the sin our Savior bore
    What He never knew, there He became
    And the guilt He bore the same
    How could He understand the sinner’s place
    Well, that was what the cross was for.

      • Hi tacticianjenro, your poem is beautiful and honest but it is not so much what you have to do but what you need to do and that is understand. Salvation is a free gift when accepted by our heart repentance which shows we believe in Jesus Christ and because we have been saved it will be shown in our words and actions when we are Born Again of God’s seed 1John 3:9 but we can’t live the Christian life in the flesh only Jesus can as He lives His life in us so we need to first put to death our evil flesh nature by the Spirit we do this by choosing to walk in the fruit of the Spirit with His empowering, then we are set free in Christ Jesus.

        I asked God for His wisdom and He showed me how to have victory perhaps the link below will help you but what God said to you is very very True, He Loves you and always will and because He Loves you He will not hurt you no matter what anyone tells you…God is Love and can do no evil.

        Christian Love Anne.

        • Sorry I just noticed tacticianjenro that the link I gave you is dead I will Post it again for you but if you still can’t click on to it put The gaining of Wisdom into my search on our Blog.

          Sad so many live in darkness because they Trust in their own understanding and don’t seek, ask and knock, like Jesus tells us to do.

          Proverbs 4:7 Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom: and with all thy getting get understanding.

          Wisdom –

          When we are Born again we will show we are and if we are known by God as His because of our heart repentance we will be Born Again or He would not have chosen us to be conformed into the image of Jesus, the only way you can loose your Salvation, which means God’s forgiveness, is to reject Jesus who forgives you.

          1John 3 : 9 No one who is Born of God will continue to sin, because God’s seed remains in him; he cannot go on sinning, because he has been Born of God.

          1John 5:18-20 We know that no one who is Born of God sins; but He who was Born of God keeps him, and the evil one does not touch him.

          John 8:34-36 Jesus replied, “I tell you the truth, everyone who sins is a slave to sin. Now a slave has no permanent place in the family, but a son belongs to it forever. So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.

          2Corinthians 13:11 Finally, brethren, farewell. Be perfect, be of good comfort, be of one mind, live in Peace; and the God of Love and Peace shall be with you.

          1 John 4:17-19 Herein is our Love made perfect, that we may have boldness in the day of judgment: because as He is, so are we in this world. There is no fear in Love; but perfect Love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in Love. We Love Him, because He first Loved us.

          Christian Love from both of us – Anne.

  6. Joyce de vivre says:

    Hello Kababayan :) Amazing, amazing, amazing poem! Maraming salamat for sharing this with us. You are an awesome poet indeed. Thanks for spreading the love of God in your post.

    Thank you for your prayers! (regarding my post about the earthquake) We are safe and sound in God’s arm here in Cebu. Though we are saddened by the continous havoc it brought to our sister city (Gihulngan, Negros), we are constantly watching and praying. Thank you also for always supporting me here. God bless you! :)

  7. I once was there, doubting His love, doubting His salvation, Oh that we have a gracious and loving God, no good works or bad works can stop him of loving love. He’s absolutely amazing and His love is so stubborn.
    Thank you for stopping by my blog. Your poem is really from the heart.

  8. My goodness! I love the way you write. That conversation had been wanting to be written down for a long time, I think! It is wonderful and I hope you will continue this blog. You are a wonderful addition to the blogging world. Thanks for liking my Easter post at When I Ride.

    • Yes, it has been the product of all my doubts and fears, and yet that was because I didn’t really believe that God loves me UNCONDITIONALLY. :) Thank you so much for the comment, hope you drop by soon! ;)

  9. It’s like we are one and the same, these things (and more) have been going through my head lately. Its nice to know that I’m not the only one and more importantly its super awesome to know that God ALWAYS loves us!
    Good write!

  10. Wow – I just stumbled on this, and I am totally blessed by your conversation with the Lord! The Lord is with you mighty warrior, so arise and be blessed in Jesus’ name! Many blessings to you!

  11. This is so me. It moves my faith when I was scrolling down the down arrow and reading the conversation between you and the Lord. Just hold on to His promises and never doubt nor fear but be still in our faithfulness in Him. Godbless Bro! =)

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